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Talking Cats Diary
Three cats. Two cities. One ongoing argument about food portions that George considers unresolved and Mack considers settled. Mule is uninterested.
Read it all in the Talking Cats Diary
The Talking Cats Diary covers everything worth covering:
Winter, spring, the brief period when the windows came out, a romantic situation that ended as Mack predicted, and the question of whether the bird bath counts as a viable water source. It does not, but we use it anyway.
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112 - Right. So That was Christmas. Mack Is Conducting Research on the Cushion.
The days since have been a specific kind of quiet I find either deeply restorative or mildly concerning depending on the hour. Mack has barely moved in three days. He is either hibernating or conducting research. He says he is conducting research.
Nick Allan
Jan 172 min read


111 - Christmas in London. A New Blanket Has Appeared on the Chair. I Am Not Making Anything of It.
A quiet one here. Peaceful, in the way that London occasionally manages when everyone has somewhere else to be. He has done something with the chair. I have assessed it. I have committed. I am not going to make a thing of it.

Mule
Jan 131 min read


110 - Christmas Morning. The Chicken Was a Proper One. The Allocation Was Adequate.
I want to begin by saying that Christmas morning was, overall, a success. The chicken was a proper one. The allocation, when it came, was adequate. It was technically adequate. Mack has declined to comment on his portion.
Nick Allan
Jan 102 min read


109 - The Shed Protest: Duration Is Not the Point. The Point Is That We Went.
The Shed Protest: Duration Is Not the Point. The Point Is That We Went. Mack says we lasted twelve minutes. It was considerably longer than that and also the duration is not the point, the point is that we went. Principles were upheld.
Nick Allan
Jan 62 min read


108 - She Spent Our Christmas Money on Dog Presents. We Are in the Shed.
She came back with more dog presents than cat presents. We've demanded our money back but she's having none of it. We're sleeping in the shed tonight as a protest.
Nick Allan
Jan 31 min read


106 - She Came Back from a Date with a Bagged Chicken. A Wing Each. George Is Disappointed.
Mum came back from another date earlier and threw a chicken in a bag in the oven. We said yes but no. Then it was cooked and she just gave us a wing. We think she loves us again. Bit extremely disappointed with the bagged chicken.
Nick Allan
Dec 27, 20251 min read


105 - The Mouse Had Recovered Some. George Chose That Moment. She Bellowed.
She started taking all the curtains down. The mouse had recovered some. George decided to take it in to calm her nerves whilst she was up the ladder. She bellowed so loud we both, and the mouse, tried to get out of the cat flap at the same time.
Nick Allan
Dec 23, 20252 min read


104 - Five Very Big Men. A Cage Around the House. We Retreated to Number 39.
Five very big men came and built what I can only describe as a cage around the house. It was like a million times worse than the window cleaner. The usual wardrobe safety was out. We disappeared up to the garden at number 29 and mainly watched Mimi parading in her window for a bit.
Nick Allan
Dec 20, 20252 min read


102 - She Seemed Almost Excited Tonight. We Are Trying Not to Build It Up.
She seemed almost excited or motivated again tonight. We've finished the bowl of Go Cat and some remains of the Aldi Fish from this morn. It wasn't nice, but these are hard times. But us cousins will be reet.
Nick Allan
Dec 13, 20251 min read


101 - She Has That Square Thing in Her Thumbs Again. VitaCat Fish Selection Is No Match.
We purposely both left half empty dishes this morning. She has that square thing in her thumbs most of the evening and her head in the clouds. Vitacat Fish selection is no match and she knows it.
Nick Allan
Dec 9, 20252 min read


Mack | Sheffield | First Post
George has already written something. I've read it. The pigeon gets a mention. Some things don't change. For what it's worth - this is better than the other thing.
Nick Allan
Nov 20, 20251 min read


George | Sheffield | First Post
I've had a look round and I'm happy with it. The space feels right. There's room to develop a thought properly, which as Mack will confirm has not always been available to me, and I intend to use it. I have several things I've been meaning to file and couldn't, for reasons of format, and now I can, and I will.
Nick Allan
Nov 19, 20251 min read
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