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Talking Cats Diary
Three cats. Two cities. One ongoing argument about food portions that George considers unresolved and Mack considers settled. Mule is uninterested.
Read it all in the Talking Cats Diary
The Talking Cats Diary covers everything worth covering:
Winter, spring, the brief period when the windows came out, a romantic situation that ended as Mack predicted, and the question of whether the bird bath counts as a viable water source. It does not, but we use it anyway.
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128 - I Have Not Written Because There Has Been Nothing to Write
It is very cold. Just the persistent, low, grey kind that sits on the house and doesn't move. The bird bath has been frozen since Wednesday. I have stopped checking. I have been watching the pigeon. I am not going to say anything further about it.

George
Mar 141 min read


127 - It. is Proper Freezing Here. We Dare not Go Out
It's proper freezing here and that white stuff you had has now come here. We dare not go out, only for essentials. Think we may have to just sleep on top of one another all day.

George
Mar 101 min read


126 - George Says Write Something. Here I Am
George says write something so here I am. Cold tonight. Proper cold. There was something white on the garden this morning. George looked at it for a long time and then announced it was temporary. He is treating this as a position rather than a forecast.

Mack
Mar 71 min read


125 - The Upstairs Situation. The Painting Has Escalated
She is painting everything. Not one room - everything. I followed her up the ladder in a supervisory capacity and she said several things I am choosing not to repeat and then closed the door. She is in better spirits than November, which matters more than the paint smell.

George
Mar 31 min read


124 - Dull, Dull, Dull. Mack Is Researching a Book
It's just dull, dull, dull here. Mack has a record sleeping competition going on and I think the puffy one is winning. He told me he's researching a book. Yeah right. She's still painting everywhere upstairs which is scary as our tails are dangerous up there.

George
Feb 281 min read


119 -Asleep All Day. Bolognaise. The Blackbird Question?
I'd been asleep all day and night and could hear the frying pan on - she was cooking a bolognaise. I couldn't resist the smell so jumped up on the counter in a semi dream. The blackbird was left just outside the back door earlier… or was it?

George
Feb 102 min read


117 - Mule. You've Gone Quiet.
I want to note that I am not concerned. I am observing. There is a difference. We sat near her. Not with her, obviously. Near. The mouse was fine. She was not fine. Different things.

George
Feb 31 min read


116 - The Mouse Was Fine. She Was Not Fine.
Not much to report here. George left a tiny mouse under the kitchen table today and she went mental, but it was that small we didn't know what all the fuss was about.

Mack
Jan 311 min read


114 - Cold and Boring. Feeding Time: Average.
Only thing that's cheered us up today - it's so cold and boring we haven't moved, apart from feeding time, which we gave an average score. Anyway, roll on summer.

George
Jan 241 min read


113 - Still Up. Not Sure Why. George Is Asleep. I'll Have the Number One Bed.
December 2025 Week 52 New Year's Eve After midnight Still up. Not sure why. She's watching something on the television with a lot of shouting and counting. George is asleep on the chair, which means I'll have the No.1 bed again which is the only genuinely good thing about tonight. There were apparently fireworks somewhere outside at midnight, but George slept through them. I've decided not to mention it. No point. New Year. Right. Everyone very exercised about it. Same house.

Mack
Jan 201 min read


112 - Right. So That was Christmas. Mack Is Conducting Research on the Cushion.
The days since have been a specific kind of quiet I find either deeply restorative or mildly concerning depending on the hour. Mack has barely moved in three days. He is either hibernating or conducting research. He says he is conducting research.

George
Jan 172 min read


111 - Christmas in London. A New Blanket Has Appeared on the Chair. I Am Not Making Anything of It.
A quiet one here. Peaceful, in the way that London occasionally manages when everyone has somewhere else to be. He has done something with the chair. I have assessed it. I have committed. I am not going to make a thing of it.

Mule
Jan 131 min read


110 - Christmas Morning. The Chicken Was a Proper One. The Allocation Was Adequate.
I want to begin by saying that Christmas morning was, overall, a success. The chicken was a proper one. The allocation, when it came, was adequate. It was technically adequate. Mack has declined to comment on his portion.

George
Jan 102 min read


109 - The Shed Protest: Duration Is Not the Point. The Point Is That We Went.
The Shed Protest: Duration Is Not the Point. The Point Is That We Went. Mack says we lasted twelve minutes. It was considerably longer than that and also the duration is not the point, the point is that we went. Principles were upheld.

George
Jan 62 min read


108 - She Spent Our Christmas Money on Dog Presents. We Are in the Shed.
She came back with more dog presents than cat presents. We've demanded our money back but she's having none of it. We're sleeping in the shed tonight as a protest.

George
Jan 31 min read


106 - She Came Back from a Date with a Bagged Chicken. A Wing Each. George Is Disappointed.
Mum came back from another date earlier and threw a chicken in a bag in the oven. We said yes but no. Then it was cooked and she just gave us a wing. We think she loves us again. Bit extremely disappointed with the bagged chicken.

George
Dec 27, 20251 min read


105 - The Mouse Had Recovered Some. George Chose That Moment. She Bellowed.
She started taking all the curtains down. The mouse had recovered some. George decided to take it in to calm her nerves whilst she was up the ladder. She bellowed so loud we both, and the mouse, tried to get out of the cat flap at the same time.

George
Dec 23, 20252 min read


104 - Five Very Big Men. A Cage Around the House. We Retreated to Number 39.
Five very big men came and built what I can only describe as a cage around the house. It was like a million times worse than the window cleaner. The usual wardrobe safety was out. We disappeared up to the garden at number 29 and mainly watched Mimi parading in her window for a bit.

George
Dec 20, 20252 min read


102 - She Seemed Almost Excited Tonight. We Are Trying Not to Build It Up.
She seemed almost excited or motivated again tonight. We've finished the bowl of Go Cat and some remains of the Aldi Fish from this morn. It wasn't nice, but these are hard times. But us cousins will be reet.

George
Dec 13, 20251 min read


101 - She Has That Square Thing in Her Thumbs Again. VitaCat Fish Selection Is No Match.
We purposely both left half empty dishes this morning. She has that square thing in her thumbs most of the evening and her head in the clouds. Vitacat Fish selection is no match and she knows it.

George
Dec 9, 20252 min read
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